Macebreaker

Macebreaker—For Mathais Blackett
 
In the land of Bryn Madoc
There is a lord of noble stock.
With gentle manner, kind and fair,
His sword is sharp, his wit is keen,
And if he should, though taking care,
Knock down a fragile vase, perhaps,
It should not have been sitting there!
 
They call him Axebane, Macebreaker
The most expensive tent pole staker
Destroyer of tape and glue
Though he's a foe of mace and axe
Cording and lamellar too,
In all the land you will not find,
A man more brave and true.
 
His foes' weapons, in the lists
Twist and buck in mighty fists
They struggle and long to flee
Though fear lives not in Meridian hearts
Stout warriors, far as the eye can see,
Their weapons, on the other hand,
Kindling would rather not be.
 
His chivalry is of great reknown
His courtly manners, his golden crown,
For women, he always gives his best.
The champion gallant of ladies fair,
With surpassing courtesy he is blest.
But just to be safe the Lord above,
Hid their hearts safely in their chests.
 
Ladies, worry not for Macebreaker,
Weep not for Rattan's Undertaker,
No matter what sorrow befall.
If some sad day in battle bright ,
This warrior fierce bravely fall,
O'er his mighty bourn take comfort,
Though his great loss will sorely gall.
 
If you should hear an infernal yell
Tis Macebreaker at the gates of Hell
Bursting out with a mighty clout
Then, my friends, listen close,
For a crash and heavenly shout
For the hinges on the pearly gates,
Are not stout enough to keep him out!